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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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 Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 3:05 pm Post subject: Joke Thread - Ouch! Invitation for UKPhil to have a joke too |
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The doctor said, "Good news is I can cure your headaches... The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press up against the base of your spine, and the pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles." Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife. When he left the hospital he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself. As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life. He saw a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I need a new suit." He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit." The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see ... size 44 long." Joe laughed, "That's right, how did you know?" " Been in the business 60 years!" Joe tried on the suit. It fit perfectly. As Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?" Joe thought for a moment and then said, "Sure." The salesman eyed Joe and said, "Let's see... 34 sleeve and 16 1/2 neck." Joe was surprised, "That's right, how did you know?" Been in the business 60 years!" Joe tried on the shirt, and it fit perfectly. As Joe adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about new shoes?" Joe was on a roll and said, "Sure." The salesman eyed Joe's feet and said, "Let's see... 101/2 E." Joe was astonished, "That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years!" Joe tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly. Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?" Joe thought for a second and said, "Sure." The salesman stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said, "Let's see...size 38." Joe laughed, "Ah ha! I got you! I've worn size 32 since I was 18 years old." The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 32! A 32 underwear would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."
Last edited by LA Metros Hockey Player on Sun Mar 14, 2004 8:57 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Herman the Tosser
Part Time City Match Preveiwer
Joined: 26 Nov 2002
Posts: 5435
Location: I AM CURRENTLY ON FIRE
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 4:39 pm Post subject: |
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Who's the lady?
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 6:02 pm Post subject: |
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| You what Herman? |
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Herman the Tosser
Part Time City Match Preveiwer
Joined: 26 Nov 2002
Posts: 5435
Location: I AM CURRENTLY ON FIRE
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 6:09 pm Post subject: |
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Who. is. the. lady?
I think it's a pretty easy question to answer. What do I know?
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 6:10 pm Post subject: |
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Ah Yeah bit slow - just a bit
A friend |
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 6:14 pm Post subject: |
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| Why do you want to know Herman? |
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Herman the Tosser
Part Time City Match Preveiwer
Joined: 26 Nov 2002
Posts: 5435
Location: I AM CURRENTLY ON FIRE
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 6:23 pm Post subject: |
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yorkcity4eva's avatar - Would ya?
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 6:24 pm Post subject: |
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| Herman the Tosser wrote: |
| yorkcity4eva's avatar - Would ya? |
LEAVE IT!
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 6:39 pm Post subject: |
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| This is a joke thread not a yorkcity4eva avatar thread. |
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Sentsura222
Reserve team player
Joined: 14 Mar 2004
Posts: 30
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 7:44 pm Post subject: |
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lmao Her names Cat.
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 7:51 pm Post subject: |
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| Sentsura222 wrote: |
| lmao Her names Cat. |
Irrelevant.
And his name is Callum Mellon - Somebody get UKPhil in here.
Last edited by LA Metros Hockey Player on Sun Mar 14, 2004 8:20 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Sentsura222
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Joined: 14 Mar 2004
Posts: 30
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 7:52 pm Post subject: |
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and ur Robert Amos. lemme guess UKPhil is Phil Moore
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 7:57 pm Post subject: Joke thread - Ouch - perfect opportunity for UKPHIL |
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| Sentsura222 wrote: |
| and ur Robert Amos. lemme guess UKPhil is Phil Moore |
Can't you even spell.
UKphil is Ukranianphil - What the hell would Phil Moore be doing on here.
UKPhil is the best arguer and downer on here.
He will not like that at all.
Get off the forum, You do Taekwondo. You are NOT A York City fan.
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Sentsura222
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Joined: 14 Mar 2004
Posts: 30
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 8:00 pm Post subject: |
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this is general chat. it doesnt have to be bout them. so haha! cmon then bring him on!
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LA Metros Hockey Player
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Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 8:04 pm Post subject: |
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| BUT ITS ON A YORK CITY FORUM |
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 8:16 pm Post subject: |
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| Herman the Tosser wrote: |
Who. is. the. lady?
I think it's a pretty easy question to answer. What do I know? |
| The person in my Avatar wrote: |
| Herman - Your worst nightmare |
Thats who it is.
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Herman the Tosser
Part Time City Match Preveiwer
Joined: 26 Nov 2002
Posts: 5435
Location: I AM CURRENTLY ON FIRE
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:01 pm Post subject: |
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Oh my.
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:20 pm Post subject: |
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| Herman the Tosser wrote: |
| Oh my. |
| Cat - Nice person in my Avatar wrote: |
Whats that supposed to mean |
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:23 pm Post subject: |
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| Herman the Tosser wrote: |
| yorkcity4eva's avatar - Would ya? |
What are you trying to say?
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:44 pm Post subject: |
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I think she's managed to work it out!
EVENTUALLY!! |
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godhead2000
First team captain
Joined: 05 Sep 2002
Posts: 3348
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:45 pm Post subject: Re: Joke thread - Ouch - perfect opportunity for UKPHIL |
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| yorkcity4eva wrote: |
| Sentsura222 wrote: |
| and ur Robert Amos. lemme guess UKPhil is Phil Moore |
Can't you even spell.
UKphil is Ukranianphil - What the hell would Phil Moore be doing on here.
UKPhil is the best arguer and downer on here.
He will not like that at all.
Get off the forum, You do Taekwondo. You are NOT A York City fan.
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Not that I am on the other guys side, but we do have some people on here who are not York fans and we do not discriminate against them. But if your only here to start arguments Sentsura222 then you may as well just leave now.
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Wednesday 4th of February 2004 a day I will never forget.
Wait a minute, what was that date again?
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Sentsura222
Reserve team player
Joined: 14 Mar 2004
Posts: 30
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:55 pm Post subject: |
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no not at all, jsut that amos came onto my forum, my taekwondo 1, and had a go at it, so blame him for me
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cat_rocks
First team sub
Joined: 14 Mar 2004
Posts: 100
Location: Leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:56 pm Post subject: |
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excuse me! hello. this is CAT. WHY are ppl talking bout me! and HU R U herman or wateva ur called! dont be askin ppl rude stuff!  |
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:56 pm Post subject: |
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| I accept some people are not York City fans on here. but they usually do talk football talk rather than irrelevant stuff about what my name is and what the name of my Avatar is. |
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:56 pm Post subject: |
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| cat_rocks is the person in my avatar. |
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Sentsura222
Reserve team player
Joined: 14 Mar 2004
Posts: 30
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:57 pm Post subject: |
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a joke is irrelevent!
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UkrainianPhil
First team captain
Joined: 27 Dec 2003
Posts: 9515
Location: Mysteron HQ
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:58 pm Post subject: |
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Can someone transfer this to 'Young Yorkies' please?
 
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What we need is a bit of "Classic GLF"........
www.york.tv |
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Sentsura222
Reserve team player
Joined: 14 Mar 2004
Posts: 30
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:59 pm Post subject: |
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oo ooo lets transfer it to that place!
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Herman the Tosser
Part Time City Match Preveiwer
Joined: 26 Nov 2002
Posts: 5435
Location: I AM CURRENTLY ON FIRE
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:59 pm Post subject: |
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Phil, c'mon, not even we deserve this over in YY. We know that YY is for pointless, stupid threads but this is taking the piss. 
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A working class face glares back at me from the glass... |
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LA Metros Hockey Player
Future Olympian
Joined: 30 Aug 2003
Posts: 5360
Location: The nice part of Leeds
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| Posted: Sun Mar 14, 2004 9:59 pm Post subject: |
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| cat_rocks wrote: |
| excuse me! hello. this is CAT. WHY are ppl talking bout me! and HU R U herman or wateva ur called! dont be askin ppl rude stuff! |
I think that will be hinting the - yorkcity4eva's avatar - would ya? comment
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